Our Unconscious Minds: Shadow & Dream Work

In this episode, Dr. Sally and Dr. Jen explore working with our unconscious minds and how that impacts our journey of transformation. 

Transcript

00:08 Jen says this episode focuses on ‘shadow work’. As the first official art therapist, Carl Jung used mandalas as a way to bring forward the unconscious. This podcast is serious about transformation, actively researching it; and maybe even being used by it. One way to bring our suffering into the light of our awareness is to actively work with our unconscious minds, and our unresolved trauma, so that we can resolve it. We have access to our deepest pain through a variety of techniques, and mechanisms. We need to uncover it, identify it, name it, disrupt it, and break free from unconscious patterns that bind us, so we can change our behavior, discover our potential, heal our wounds, align with our values, our authenticity, work with our dreams, integrate our shadows, amplify our creativity, and our voice. Jen then cites trauma expert Bessel van der Kolk, and his book, The Body Keeps the Score. She adds that the podcast is about allowing ourselves to know what we know, and feel what we feel, as that's the pathway to healing. We stop suppressing our trauma and pain, and bring that information into the light, so we can deal with it. We use writing, creative expression, contemplative practices, therapeutic interventions, hypnosis, dream analysis, as shadow work. The unconscious mind doesn't know the difference between reality and imagination. We can actually revisit those wounded parts within us by using our imaginations. Jen can bring the wounded Jen into the light of the present moment, hold her, and build that field of safety she needs. The unconscious mind doesn't know if that's a real experience, or something imagined. Our unconscious minds have great healing potential that we don't even know about. 

 07:56 Sally says the unconscious can indirectly motivate all our behaviors without us knowing, and wars are driven by inter-generational pain. Carl Jung coined the words shadow work, for the process of bringing the unconscious into the light. After citing Jung, Sally adds that if we want to reach our full potentials, and stop being driven by dark compulsions, we need to go into this work. She then cites James Hollis about repeating patterns. Until 100 years ago, we used words like sin or evil for human shadow,  referring to external behaviors, but the shadow is all that we cannot see. These are the parts of us that are repressed, denied, split off from, and disowned. Particularly with social media, we only present one side of ourselves, and the rest stays in the dark. And as one of my teachers said to me, the brighter the light, the darker the shadow. The central metaphor for this podcast series is the Yin Yang symbol, because it's 50/50 light and dark. So it's helpful to put ourselves in containers where we can get feedback - therapy, trusted family and friends, dreamwork, creative practice, etc. Our creativity can start a dialogue with the symbols and images, which reveal things about ourselves. If we don’t do shadow work, our mental health can suffer considerably. We are driven by compulsions. We have patterns that keep repeating, and which destroy our opportunities, through poor self image, and our relationships. So the more we can integrate our shadow (bring it forward, look at it, own it, deal with it, instead of avoiding or bypassing it), the healthier our lives will be. The more integrated the inside, the more integrated the outside. We can also bypass, become toxically positive, when we only want to show one side - the light. When we integrate shadow we will grow, have improved energy, will release our trauma, unblock all the repressed parts. Our creativity will begin to flow. We will become much more intuitive and aligned with our neighbors, families and friends, and just generally have improved wellbeing and self acceptance. It's a number one health strategy. Sally then cites Rumi.

15:56 Jen says we're creating a safe place for non-shaming of shadow. We all have an intergenerational responsibility to end these patterns in our lifetime, so that we don't repeat them. Changes within us matter. When we do not integrate our shadow, it finds a way to express itself. Those parts of ourselves that we deny, repress or ignore will emerge in our behavior, in very subtle ways. Whatever lives in our subconscious mind really wants to be felt. That’s our healing intelligence and natural instinct. Jen then describes Freuds’ map of the conscious, pre-conscious and unconscious.  Jung said that we have a collective unconscious, where we share universal archetypes, symbols and experiences. Jung stressed the importance of integrating the unconscious into our conscious awareness, through the symbols and patterns that appear in our dreams. Artists draw a lot of inspiration from dreams. Jen recommends keeping a journal next to the bed because dream work is ultimately about developing more intimacy with our inner world.

20:17 Sally cites Carolyn Kaufman, that the shadow is the seat of creativity. Creativity is also the perfect antidote. As we sleep we go into delta, which is the long slow brainwave, and we start to dream, and the imagination is liberated. In theta, too, storylines, characters, symbols start coming alive. 1) We can record those messages from a liberated subconscious that come alive at night. 2) Another tool is looking at our families of origin. We received messages from our early caregivers, about the things that were not acceptable. She gives an example, of her own shadow “nobody will love me if I'm not perfect”. 3) Noticing our projections is another good method. Sally gives an example, then cites Jack Kirby, who says the development and size of our shadow runs parallel to that of the ego, and its defenses. So the shadow is a defense mechanism. It keeps us safe, we think. But it doesn't. That's the paradox. 4) Then there’s the golden shadow, the gifts that we're scared to bring forward, as fear abandonment -  if we step into our full power, we fear people might reject us. We have those capacities that we haven't yet liberated, yet we see them in somebody else. Then we resent them. We can liberate the potential in our shadow. 

27:32 Jen says coming into conscious awareness takes a lot of practice, returning to oneself again, and again, with gentle attention, looking for those patterns. It is so powerful. Yet the shadows are arising as a protective mechanism, as a form of intelligence, as a form of keeping us safe, of compartmentalizing our pain, or detaching from it, and yet that becomes toxic, it becomes parasitic. What starts out as an intelligence, becomes something really harmful. But there is no one size fits all approach to the unconscious mind, no quick fix. It can be a slow and grueling process. It happens in layers, cycles and in seasons. And we deserve support from professionals or trusted loved ones when we're dealing with repressed trauma. So I really want to encourage you to not go it alone on this journey into your unconscious mind. No one can go inside of you, but we can get the support that we need from professionals, our animals, or from nature. So as we work inside of this mysterious realm of our unconscious minds, it's likely that we're going to encounter things that destabilize us. And those revelations can be really painful. So not forcing our unconscious mind to do things is important. Taking a dominant orientation towards our mind and inner world is not helpful. Sometimes we can be our own worst bully. And that too is an unconscious pattern that can come into the light. And the only antidote for that pattern is to become gentle. It can also be really damaging to feel things that we're just not ready to feel. And so don't let anyone force you into unpacking content that you're not yet ready to deal with. We unfold and blossom in the light of gentle and compassionate attention. Watch for repeating feelings, behaviors, thoughts, symbols. What's that inner voice saying over and over again? Are we even aware that we have an inner voice? What clues can it give us? The patterns will lead us to where we need to go, to resolve whatever it is that's lurking in our unconscious mind. Stay self regulated, or co regulated with trusted supporters. Because when these painful artifacts surface in our conscious mind, when they've been repressed for a long time, we can become very disregulated. Focus on the relationship with oneself. It's all about building intimacy with our inner world. Self awareness is like a flashlight in the darkness of the unconscious mind. And without that flashlight, it's really difficult to get around. Jen then cites Jenny Davidow, from her book, Embracing your subconscious, bringing all parts of you into creative partnership. Then emphasises integration, integration integration.

36:30 Sally suggests we have to soften to allow the subconscious to emerge. It's like inviting an animal to come down to the waterhole to drink, by sitting quietly. The more you relax, the longer, the slower the brainwaves. The more you're in parasympathetic, the more the subconscious, the imagination, and the patterns will bubble up from inside. And we honor that process by giving it time. ‘Play’ brings it forward, not stress, work, conflict - being in sympathetic, or in beta brainwaves can prevent this. That's the response to the external world. That's not when the internal subconscious emerges. That’s in Delta - sleep, dream states, or in theta, or alpha -when relaxed in parasympathetic. Notice the images that repeat themselves. Sally gives an example with her paintings where she descends into the symbols, the archetypes. Then she cites Jung’s thoughts on the centrality of mandalas in his art therapy work - the square and the circle, the archetype of fullness, which signifies the wholeness of the self. She shows her own mandala, and describes how the form allows the subconscious to emerge from impulse, turning the pre-verbal instinct into the verbal, and therefore into consciousness. However, the more authentic we become, the more shame free, the more we risk our attachments. I might end up alone. That is a very risky thing to do. And the deeper we descend, the harder it is. But we can also guarantee there's an ascension afterwards, that's brighter. She ends by quoting Marianne Williamson, who says there's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine like children.